What the Hell Is Love

He was not so tall and rather fat
Had a Labrador and a limping cat
Bored in the city with a broken heart
Had enough money and a credit card

..what the hell is friendship
He must have turned it off
And most of all he wondered
What the hell is love?

Have I said here that I love K’s Choice? The only songs I’ve been downloading lately are theirs. So far I have thirty, out of how many I don’t know what. This band is old. I don’t think they’re still in circulation, but their songs are powerful enough from the past to touch me.

My current favorites: ‘If You’re Not Scared’, ‘Wait’, ‘Until I’m Fine’ and ‘Busy’. They’re far from deep. But I like them because together they play what I’m feeling at the moment. And that is sleepless and horrible.

I wouldn’t go so far as to say that my life is in the dustbin or the toilet lately, and to be fair to myself, I’d say it’s far from it. I’m supposed to be enjoying the things happening right now, and I guess I am. ‘Fun’ is not enough to describe the wonderful things that have been up lately. After all, I got 1.75 for the final exam in bowling (Betch please eat that and stop hankering about Math 11). S’all good.

And so why am I sleepless and feeling horrible tonight? I hate paradoxes only when they apply to me. Otherwise they’re cool. But now they’re not and this paradox makes me lose sleep, and the paradox itself is that I am happy but I feel horrible. You know what, I’m going down in front of me. Now if you don’t know an emo line when you see one, go to hell.

What the hell is love? I took it seriously overmuch. Next time I’ll be suspicious. And next time I’ll probably eat those words but what the fucking burning hell I’ve been eating too many words lately and I’m suffering from a bad case of indigestion. Screw you. Screw me. This is how I pay for being too sure about everything, for being too right in some things, and for being too concerned about nothing important.

So what the hell is love?

I don’t want to know again.