Tuesday, April 25, 2006

Palasyo

If you want to beat your stupid brother the next time you have an argument about whose turn it is to wash the dishes, flaunt this. Need I remind you that physical violence is below you, a civilized homo sapiens.

Right.

Anyway, here are some informal fallacies you will find useful in your everyday existence. You can hurl them at Kris Aquino the next time she says that her hair makes her look younger. You can give your parents a taste of your potent intelligence the next time they won’t let you go to that swimming party. You can, you can. Learn some.

Argumentum Ad Hominem (below the belt, personal attack)
Stupid Little Brother: Ate ang pangit-pangit mo naman! Bagsak ka sa Math! Mas marami ang pera ko sa iyo!
You: Ad hominem! Ad hominem! Maghugas ka na ng plato.”
SLB: (Tucks his imp’s tail and quietly picks up a sponge and Joy, in the perfect world.) Opo ate.

Argumentum Ad Misericordiam (appeal to pity)
You: Mama, parang awa mo na, payagan mo na ako…wala na nga akong magawa sa bahay eh…napiprito na ang utak ko sa TV at PC at cellphone…ikaw rin…mamamatay na ako ng maaga…nasa lahi pa naman natin yung cancer…pano ka na? Walang mag-aalaga sa iyo…kawawa ka naman…mamamatay ka ng maaga…(katok sa kahoy)
Mama: (telebabad kay Tita Precy, hindi ka tinignan. O pinakinggan. Alam niya at alam mo na gasgas na ang linya mo.)

Argumentum Ad Baculum (appeal to force)
Mama: Kapag hindi ka tumahimik malalagot ka sa akin. May mahalaga akong kausap.
You: …
Mama: Oo nga Precy, ang payat niya ngayon no? Oi teka nga pala, gusto mo ba ng herbal diet pills? May nabili kasi ako eh! Pumayat ako ng konti…
You: (knock on wood).

Post Hoc, Ergo, Propter Hoc (appeal to a false cause)
Tita Bel: May regla ka di ba? Wag kang maligo kundi mababaliw ka.
You: Antagal ko nang naliligo pag may dalaw ako ha? Bakit hindi pa ako nababaliw?
Tita Bel: Sige, maligo ka na. Wala nga palang diperensya.

Complex Question
Betch: Hindi ka ba naliligo?
Cc: Hindi.
Betch: Hindi ka ba naliligo?
Cc. Oo.


Petitio Principii (begging the question)
SLB: Ikaw ang maglinis ng banyo.
You: Ayoko nga! Bakit ba?!
SLB: Kasi ayokong maglinis ng banyo.
You: Sapagkat?
SLB: Ikaw ang maglilinis eh!
(so on so forth ad infinitum)

Argumentum Ad Vericundiam (appeal to false authority)
Kris: Sabi nila I’m looking younger and younger daw. They say it’s my hair.
(sino ‘sila’…?)
***
Paul: Sabi ni Ms. Gigi si Magellan ang sumakop ng Pilipinas! Siyempre, siya ang History teacher natin kaya tama siya.


I love my Philo notes.

5 Comments:

Blogger marX said...

i love my Philo too. basta wag ko lng maalala yung facial expression ni ma'm sioco! huhu. nagagamit ko rin tinuturo nya.

8:34 AM  
Blogger lizette said...

siyempre naman. philosophy for the layman. you've just saved yourself from reading some of the most boring and incomprehensible books in the world. :)

4:17 PM  
Anonymous mary said...

simply funny.. hehehe.. realistic ng examples..! hehe

9:13 PM  
Blogger lizette said...

oi mery! hm. blogger ka na rin pala no? seen your lj. daan ka pa ha? salamat!

7:34 PM  
Anonymous Steel said...

Intelligently hilarious. The kind of entries we'd like to appear in The Man Blog. Can you regurgitate this one please?

4:01 AM  

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